sábado, 16 de maio de 2020

Version 2.012

Fridays are those days that seem to arrive too soon, yet by the time they get here, one is completely pooped and the week does weigh on us. I miss my ugly desk at the office. At least my back did not hurt as much and I had two computer screens. This afternoon, my neighbor Mike had another one of his balcony concerts. I hardly knew any of the songs he covered, although some were his own, so it's hard for me to know them. I left $40 in his tip bucket, since I also wanted a t-shirt and they are $20 each.

Later on, I met a new neighbor, who had been at the concert. It turns out she's the lady who is always doing work in her front flower beds. I do see her work, which is pristine, if a leaf or flower is bent the wrong way, she just clips it; but I only remember seeing her once before and that was long enough ago that I would not recognize her. She and I talked while I was walking Julian, as it just so happened that I was wearing the Soludos shoes that have a Boston terrier, that looks exactly like Julian, even though he's a French bulldog. Both breeds are a cross between terrier-type dogs and English bulldogs. Anyway, she mentioned my shoes, which I got yesterday and the selling point that the marking people dreamed up was that they are conversation pieces.

Julian made a fool of himself because there were other dogs walking around, so he kept jumping and being obnoxious. It is odd that he acts like that outside, since he is almost a little angel when he's inside. He escaped through the front door, while I was leaving to go to the concert, since my hands were full, but I called him and he came running into my arms immediately. It is so odd that he is this obedient because Alfred would just run off and want us to play chase with him, which was a pain. Alfred was a perfect dog in all other aspects.

I must say that when I got Julian, he was completely wild and did not know how to behave. He did not even understand why one would ride in a car. Now he thinks that car rides lead to pet day-care, where he plays with this friends, Starburcks for puppuccinos and baby bell cheese, and walks in the park. He has been completely Frenchified.

At night, I felt like watching a movie. Well, I felt like watching a French movie, but I did not search very well. Instead, I watched a South African movie that had part of the story in France. I don't think I had ever spent this much time listening to Africans, so that was interesting. Toward the end, I almost thought that the story line was going to turn into "Os Maias," but a more wholesome, or shall I say less perverted, ending ensued. It was a very cheesy movie, but the photos of the actors and crew during the credits were interesting.

sexta-feira, 15 de maio de 2020

Version 2.011

Things are opening up. Today I got a message from some friends who want to go out to celebrate two birthdays at the Coastal Fish Company, which has a patio. I replied that I would go if they could secure the table on the northwest corner of the patio, which is the one that has the most ventilation, since it's farthest away from the walls and close to the lake. Yes, I have already evaluated the risk of the patio and, since the dinner is scheduled for May 30, I have also thought that there's plenty of time for things to get reassessed and it getting cancelled. I suppose that I could not go, but if I cannot eliminate the risk, I need to learn to manage it. Plus, I still have not ruled out not going.

My neighbor who went to New Jersey to do crisis nursing sent a message. It is hard to tell if she is in good spirits or if she is trying to convince herself more than us. She thinks things are not going well; in fact they are getting worse and access to PPE (personal protective equipment) is not good. After seeing the picture that she sent of herself, I am very concerned. It does not seem like her equipment is sufficient, but maybe she is in an area that does not have direct contact with infected patients. The hospital is supposed to get some PPE in this week. She promised another update on Saturday.

This week I also received an email from my former neighbor in Houston, who is 95. She is being extra-cautious and I am surprised that she has decided to not go golfing. She said some of her friends are going, but she thinks it too risky. I wonder if I will see her again before this is under control. I wonder if I will see a lot of people. I tell myself that nothing has changed, we merely have more information about the existence of a virus, but it existed before we found it, and there are others that remain unknown. The underlying restriction remains:
"We say that the hour of death cannot be forecast, but when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future. It never occurs to us that it has any connection with the day already begun or that death could arrive this same afternoon, this afternoon which is so certain and which has every hour filled in advance."

~ Marcel Proust

quinta-feira, 14 de maio de 2020

Version 2.010

I have spent the last few days slowly remembering "The Brief History of the Dead," the 2006 dystopic novel by Kevin Brockmeier. Many years ago, I bought an autographed copy at Nightbird Books, a newly opened bookstore in Fayetteville, AR, initially located near the mill.

To live up to its name, Nightbird Books had a very large birdcage, so one would browse books with the sound of chirping birds in the background and one would walk by the birdcage and spend some minutes observing the animals. The other unique thing about Nightbird Books was that it was going to be a wine bar as well, except the owner never got around to having the time to go to Little Rock and spend a whole day getting trained to obtain an alcohol license.

In 2006, La Maison des Tartes, one of my favorite bakeries and restaurants, was still open and one could visit the bookstore and walk up the parking lot and have a cup of coffee and a pastry. Two years later, the restaurant closed, but one of its founding members, who had already left, had opened a quaint little restaurant down the street called The Brick House Kitchen, which soon became my favorite place where to drag my friends to.

I recall having one of my most enjoyable meals there: a beef stew so tender served over a cauliflower purée that was utterly divine. I once asked the waitress what was the secret to the cauliflower purée being so unbelievably creamy and she replied that it was probably copious amounts of butter and thick cream. Oh, but it was so worth it!

After Nightbird Books moved to Dickson St. to occupy the building where the Ozark Mountain Smokehouse used to be -- my French conversation group often met at the Smokehouse on Wednesday mornings for breakfast, -- The Brick House Kitchen opened the BHK Café in the bookstore, but I always preferred the restaurant to the café. Alas, both only lasted a few more years.

At the end of last February, and after 14 years in business, Nightbird Books also closed. I believe the last time I had been to it was in October of 2013, when I visited Fayetteville to attend a friend's wedding, but I always enjoyed shopping there and am sorry that it no longer exists.

"The Brief History of the Dead" often comes to me mostly because of the idea of the in-between world, the world of the living-dead, those who are waiting to be forgotten by the living, so that they may enter the world of the dead, as the author mentions is the belief of many African societies. The book's action takes place in two worlds: ours, the world of the living, and the in-between world, the world of the living-dead; the latter's action is driven by a pandemic that has afflicted our world.

I had a hard time getting into the story, as fiction is a struggle for me, but once I was in, it was a page turner. The end did seem inevitable, but I could not help but feel tremendous disbelief that it had just finished like that.

Now, as we live through the pandemic, I feel disbelief as well. I feel like at some point during the last two months the universe took a wrong turn in the time-space continuum and we entered a universe that is almost make-believe. It is hard to accept a reality that so eerily feels like fiction.

quarta-feira, 13 de maio de 2020

Version 2.009

Today USDA released the first WASDE under a security protocol for the pandemic. Last year, in April, I got to visit Washington, DC, while the cherry trees were still in bloom to attend the release of the April WASDE. The WASDE report is a monthly publication of the United States Department of Agriculture that attempts to quantify the supply and demand of agricultural commodities. WASDE stands for World Agricultural Supply and Demand Estimates.

Traditionally, the report is released in the USDA building under a lock up, this means that that wing of the building is shut off from the outside world during the release: no telephones, no Internet, no windows, nothing. To get in, you must leave all your personal belongings in a locker room and then go through security, including a metal scanner. All this trouble because the first case of insider trading was on account of USDA's estimates of the cotton crop in 1905, although suspicion of something fishy was already around in 1904.

In May, the first estimates of the new crop are released, so this is a very important report; then the estimates get revised every month, as new information becomes available. In February, USDA also releases an Outlook of what the new crop might look like, but it's just estimates for the world and key countries and the numbers are mere guidelines. Of course, this year, February was right before the pandemic, so those estimates became moot almost immediately.

I got to attend the Outlook conference this year, right around Mardi Gras. In fact, that Saturday before Mardi Gras, I went to the Wharf in DC and saw the fireworks. It was packed, but only when I got there did I realize that it would be so crowded. The true reason why I went to the Wharf was because I wanted to see what the planters looked like -- yes, silly me, I wanted to see what kind of plants they had used to decorate the area during winter, right before Spring. Everything was already a bit sad and ready to be switched, but I am sure that it had looked splendorous over Christmas. One day I'd like to see it.

At the Wharf, I merely walked around and stayed away from most people. I am one of those odd balls who does not like crowds and feels very bothered if people get too close to my personal space. I did not even go to a restroom or stop at a restaurant. It was so crowded. Little did I know that, at exactly that time, in New Orleans, people were getting infected with coronavirus, and the NOLA Mardi Gras celebrations would become a hotspot for the spreading of Covid-19.

I once read that being an introvert is a survival mechanism, since one does not engage much with other people and lives a less exciting life. I would not call my life boring, but I recall a conversation with a good friend when I was in 10th grade. She told me that I was indeed boring and sad, so she started hanging out with other more interesting friends. She did come around decades later. And I suppose I also failed to live up to my reputation.

terça-feira, 12 de maio de 2020

Version 2.008

I can't get over how many Portuguese people ask me if I am doing OK in the U.S. They talk to me as if my life is in eminent danger. And today, someone sent me an article from Expresso saying that people of Portuguese ancestry were having trouble getting help in the U.S. because they could not speak English. I find that very odd because when I schedule an appointment at the doctor, for example, I am asked in what language I would like to communicate. Hospitals and law enforcement have a network of volunteers who can speak foreign languages and can assist in case of an emergency. I know because, when I lived in Stillwater, OK, I was the Portuguese-speaking volunteer interpreter.

Less than two weeks ago, while talking with a Russian friend who lives in Houston, TX, she complained to me that, at the community center that she attended, they had information in Spanish. She felt like everything should be in English -- if you can't speak English, you're in the wrong country is her view. I told her that the U.S. does not have an official language; in fact, if she went to Chinatown, the street names would be in Chinese. If you go to East Providence, RI, there are street names in Portuguese. In the U.S., you can get by without speaking English, if you wish. Lots of people do it.

When I started my current job, one of my co-workers was Brazilian and she was spending a few months in the U.S. to familiarize herself with the American business. Our company hired someone, an American person, to drive her around and take her to places like the bank for her to open an account, the Social Security Office, etc., even though she spoke perfect English. Yes, there are people here who make an honest living helping others navigate the bureaucracy.

Even when I came to the U.S. as an exchange student, almost 25 years ago, one of the Study Abroad Office assistants drove me around campus to get a room in a residence hall, buy a meal plan, enroll for classes, open a bursar's account, sign up to take the TOEFL, etc. Then, in my dorm, there were student volunteers who would walk with us around campus to show us where our classes were. This is the way America works. There are lots of people willing to help others and the system is based on people helping each other.

But let's turn the tables and see if the Portuguese live up to the standards that they demand of others. Is it common practice in Portugal to facilitate the life of Ukrainians or Germans, for example? Do hospitals and government offices offer access to translators and interpreters? And how is the expat community in Portugal faring in this pandemic?

segunda-feira, 11 de maio de 2020

O #EstudoEmCasa


Depois de três semanas de #EstudoEmCasa é possível uma tentativa de primeira avaliação, na generalidade, à iniciativa do Ministério da Educação como resposta à continuação da proibição de abertura das escolas e, portanto, de aulas em regime presencial. Essa análise, porém, limita-se apenas às peças transmitidas pela televisão, não considerando (por desconhecimento) que apoios tiveram os alunos, com ou sem internet, como suportes escritos para professores e alunos, e outros.

É certo que vou deixar sem resposta um dos motivos da minha curiosidade, que era, como disse em texto anterior, saber “como vão ser integrados os elementos fornecidos via TV na programação que os professores irão gizar nas suas disciplinas”.

Version 2.007

Today was Mother's Day in the U.S. I saw several families outside, sitting in the gardens, rather than spending their time indoors. Yesterday, I drove around the city, since I was concerned that the battery in my car might die, and saw so many people driving. At Shelby Farms there were also lots of people out and even families having picnics. Surprisingly, Coastal Fish Company, a local seafood restaurant by Hyde Lake, on Shelby Farms, was jam-packed. Most of their sitting is in a covered outdoor patio, but still it was impressive to see so many people out.

Memphis started to shut down about the time 10 cases had been identified, some of them in people who had not traveled. But before that, the local community started to limit large gatherings. The Memphis Economic Club was supposed to have an event at the St. Jude campus, but it got canceled back in February and we were informed that it was too risky for the children. St. Jude is one of the leading research hospitals for the treatment of infant cancer.

The City Mayor (the County also has a Mayor) keeps us all informed via NextDoor and on the city's website. At some point, when the weather started to warm up, he had all the city parks shut down and policed and we were admonished for wanting to be outdoors. I am almost certain that having St. Jude made the city extra-careful managing this virus. The plan to re-open the city is available online. It is a phased approach and there have to be certain conditions met to proceed from one phase to the next.

Last Friday, I spoke to my boss. Per corporate's orders, we are to work from home until the end of May, but the decision to return to the office will have input from the local teams, so it must be what is right for each community. I hope everything goes well, but I am always obsessing over what can go wrong.

domingo, 10 de maio de 2020

Version 2.006

"Bicabornato de sódio." When I read it I thought that it could not be right, "sódio" doesn't seem right. Isn't it baking soda in English? Maybe it should be "bicabornato de soda" or "sodo"? "Sodo" is definitely not right. But there's "sodium," so maybe "sódio" is indeed right... I cannot tell how many times I go through conversations like this on my head. I am one of those people who constantly has an on-going dialog in her head.

Many months ago, I was reading Nicholas Kristof in the NYT and he said that the easiest way to know if someone is proficient in a foreign language is to ask them to say the words to door knob, clothes hanger, and electrical outlet. OK, how do you say those in Portuguese, I asked myself. For several minutes, I had no idea. Well -- I was beginning to resign myself to being ignorant --, when in doubt, one can always revert to calling something "coiso" or "coisa." But even as I write "coisa," it looks foreign. Not foreign in the sense of a foreign language, but foreign as is alien.

When I was in 12th grade, we did not have a textbook for English. Instead, we would read articles from Time magazine or Newsweek. I subscribed to Newsweek for a while, then. If you were learning Portuguese, what newspaper or magazine would you subscribe to? Which one would improve your chances of becoming fluent in the language?

I do not have any subscriptions to a Portuguese news outlet. In the U.S., I subscribe to the NYT, Bloomberg, and the WashPost; but sometimes, I also donate to NPR, in fact, I used to contribute to MPB, which is an affiliate of NPR. MPB stands for Mississippi Public Radio and they are located in Oxford, MS, where there is a Portuguese bakery, called Lusa. No, I've never lived in MS, but they're poor, so I figured they could use some of my money.

I visited Lusa once, when I lived in Memphis the first time. The drive is very boring, but it is rather worth it, even though I've only been there once. (It's hard to go places when you have a dog, you always feel super-guilty about leaving them behind; at least I do...)

Ah, but this to say that I spend over $700/year on American media and I spend nothing on Portuguese media. I get depressed reading Portuguese news. It is such poor quality and it requires that I stop thinking, plus I don't understand the language. I barely speak it these days.


sábado, 9 de maio de 2020

Version 2.005

I woke up to a rainy day and even though it was pouring, it took me a while to realize it. I had seen the forecast yesterday and yet I was shocked at my surprise of how much it was raining and how dark the day was. And it was also chilly; the temperature has been unpleasant all week long and I often go to the air system setting to see if I made a mistake.

The morning was mostly spent on conference calls since 7:30 AM. We all cheer that it's Friday, but time is going by so fast that the rest of the week becomes a blur. During the third conference call, I hear the cardinals outside and I went to the window to see if I could find them, but I could not. For a few weeks now, a couple of cardinals have been coming to the garden to feast on our bird feeders. The male watches the surroundings and the female eats. Very seldom does the male eat and he only does it when he approaches the female and she puts food in his mouth. They seem like a nice couple.

The U.S. unemployment rate is at 14.7%, but it could be 5% higher, since the margin of error is much wider than the data indicates--there aren't that many observations with similar conditions to validade the estimate. But leave it to Americans to freak out about an unemployment rate that is trivial in other parts of the world. It is hard to imagine that health insurance will not be decoupled from employment after this pandemic or, at least, an affordable basic insurance will have to be available, no questions asked.

Yesterday, we learned about the killing of a black Georgia young man that took place in February. Why only now did we hear about it? Probably because the two white men involved, one of them a former police officer, were charged with the crime. And now we ask black folks to wear masks, when even with a bare face they are targets. It just seems like a catch 22.

sexta-feira, 8 de maio de 2020

Version 2.004

Tennessee made the national news today, as it is one of the states with a large stockpile of Covid-19 tests, since early on it asked the private labs to start producing tests. Access to a test has been liberalized and the state is paying for all tests, so the insurance companies will not even be billed.

One would think that everyone would be lauding TN, but in a world with people dying and and inadequate supply of tests, does it make sense to make the resource available for free? Furthermore, of the self-selected people who have chosen to get tests, 99% test negative. Thus it would be best to either assign the tests randomly to a representative sample of the population or do contact tracing and test anyone who's been in contact with someone who has tested positive.

It is quite surprising that TN is in such a situation. Prior to the pandemic, the plan of the governor for this year was to see if a TN case could be taken to the Supreme Court to challenge Roe vs. Wade. I guess one never knows what rabbit comes out of this hat.

quinta-feira, 7 de maio de 2020

Dia Mundial da Língua Portuguesa


Foi ontem o dia mundial da língua portuguesa. Lembremos como no século XVI havia uma  preocupação maior do que hoje com a nossa língua.

Floresça, fale, cante, oiça-se e viva
A portuguesa língua, e já onde for,
Senhora vá de si, soberba e altiva.
Se té qui esteve baixa e sem louvor,
Culpa é dos que a mal exercitaram,
Esquecimento nosso, e desamor.
(António Ferreira, Poemas Lusitanos)

'E verdadeiramente que não tenho a nossa língua por grosseira nem por bons os argumentos com que alguns querem provar que é essa; antes é branda para deleitar, grave para engrandecer, eficaz para mover, doce para pronunciar, breve para resolver e acomodada às matérias mais importantes da prática e escritura.
Para falar, é engraçada, com um modo senhoril; para cantar, é suave, com um certo sentimento que favorece a música; para pregar , é substanciosa, com uma gravidade que autoriza as razões e as sentenças; para escrever cartas, nem tem infinita cópia que dane, nem brevidade estéril que a limite; para histórias, nem é tão florida que se derrame, nem tão seca que busque o favor das alheias.
A pronunciação não obriga a ferir o céu da boca com aspereza, nem a arrancar as palavras com veemência do gargalo.
Escreve-se da maneira que se lê, e assim se fala.
Tem de todas as línguas o melhor: a pronunciação da latina, a origem da grega, a familiaridade da castelhana, a brandura da francesa, a elegância da italiana. Tem mais adágios e sentenças que todas as vulgares, em fé de sua antiguidade. E, se à língua hebreia, pela honestidade das palavras, chamaram santa, certo que não sei eu outra que tanto fuja de palavras claras em matéria descomposta, quanto a nossa. E, para que diga tudo, um só mal tem, e é que, pelo pouco que lhe querem seus naturais, a trazem mais remendada que capa de pedinte!'
(Francisco Rodrigues Lobo, A Corte na Aldeia)

Hoje, depois do triste desfecho do acordo ortográfico que parece ninguém querer reconhecer, temos de nos contentar em relembrar os clássicos…

Version 2.003

After having breakfast, I took Julian out for the daily morning walk. I need to get into the habit of listening to my podcasts again, since without having to drive to work, I end up not listening to the radio. Marketplace was not out yet, so the Penguin podcast was it.

They had an interview with David Harewood, who has just finished a new audio recording of H.G. Wells' "War of the Worlds" and if that isn't apropos of our current endeavors, I don't know what is. Wells always reminds that, when I was a kid, I watched the film "The Time Machine" on TV. It was one of my favorites and it was in the subtitles of that movie that I learned the Portuguese word "soletrar." That is the only Portuguese word that I know when and how I learned it. In English, there are a few.

My nextdoor neighbor, who is a nurse, is in New Jersey. Last week, she sent me an SMS saying that she and her husband were on the way up north to do crisis nursing. I thought it curious that she would let me know such a thing, as I do not consider us to be friends and I do come across as very cold and unapproachable when people first meet me, but I often wake up with messages from her wishing me a good day, since I had crossed her mind during her insomnia, midway through the night.

It is odd, but not unlikely, in the U.S. to have people who are emotionally so available that they send loving messages to strangers. I, on the other hand, have been failing terribly at sending messages to friends. Work has been intense, especially because we have a big USDA report coming out next week. I am also not feeling as productive in the cooking department. The fridge is still rather full, but I look at it and feel as if I have nothing to eat. One could say that one's feelings towards one's wardrobe have been transferred to the contents of the refrigerator.





quarta-feira, 6 de maio de 2020

Version 2.002

Working from home is a little bit more stressful than going to the office. For starters, one always second guesses if we have put in the time. If the dog makes noise while on a conference call, one feels mortified. At home, grabbing a cup of coffee feels akin to slacking off. My overactive conscience is a pain.

I got two phone calls today. The first was from my boss checking on me to see if I needed anything and whether I was feeling well physically and mentally. He tries to call about once a week and always makes sure to ask about my family and my dog. The second phone call was from a teacher who is running for the Shelby County School Board and she was calling to request my vote on August 6 -- speaking of voting, I should update my voter registration address. The candidate asked me if I had been affected by the lockdown and was genuinely surprised to hear that I still had a job, thus I had not been affected financially.

She seemed to be on the ball in terms of her campaign organization, but I'm not sure her platform makes sense. She's justifiably concerned about the children who do not have Internet access and cannot participate in school activities during the pandemic. Her proposed solution to the problem is to create hot spots in the schools, so that the nearby houses can connect to the Internet. She assumed that I did not know what a hot spot was and tried to explain it by using the example of Starbucks; of course, she fails to grasp that Starbucks' hot spots go as far as their parking lot.

I suggested that she needed to organize volunteers to work with the children, but that's probably not a wise solution either. God knows all the weirdos who are out there waiting for such an opportunity. Plus, I am emabarassed to say that I basically repeated a variation of Governor Bill Lee's idea of asking volunteers to babysit the kids while schools were closed and their parents were working. As I said, I am embarassed that I uttered such a stupid idea.

My second idea was much better, though: ask the Internet service providers to donate dongles to the kids, but, alas, I didn't tell her about it. I considered it, but realized that it would take me a long time to explain, as I assumed she did not know what a dongle was.

In other news, which are basically the same these days, William H. Grey, the demographer with the Brookings Institution, has been tracking the spread of coronavirus by county in the U.S., using NYT and U.S. Census Bureau data. The map that he published on April 29 does not bode well for our health. The virus is spreading in rural U.S., in places such as the Texas Panhandle where temperatures have been breaking records, close to 40° Celcius, thus forget about the prospect of a summer respite.

terça-feira, 5 de maio de 2020

Version 2.001

The U.S. personal savings rate has jumped to 13.1%, the highest percentage value since November 1981. Of course, if GDP falls, it will be even higher. The 1981 recession was due to the Fed Reserve, at the time led by Paul Volcker, increasing the interest rate to fight inflation. In his letter to shareholders, Warren Buffet praised Jay Powell, the current Fed Chairman, profusely and said that he had always put Volcker on a pedestal, but that Powell's willingness to step into the market so early on had put him up there, close to the top of the pedestal.

This crisis is strange not just for the implications to our health, but also because, after we've intentionally inflicted the biggest beating to the economy since the Great Depression, the overall demeanor of people does not seem as desperate as during the subprime crisis. In my personal case, the only times in which I have felt sheer panic were when I had been walking the dog and people would strike a conversation and start to get close.

As soon as someone looked my way and smiled, I could feel the beginning of an anxiety attack. I was taken back to my childhood, when I would walk outside and pray that no neighbor would speak to me. I was perceived to be rude and stuck up, but what I suffered from was fear, extreme fear of talking to other people. So I was taken aback by the resurgence of my early childhood phobia.

I worked on overcoming my panic by reverting to what seems like a more logical approach. I am five feet tall and the social distancing guidelines indicate at least a six-foot separation between people, thus I began to measure in my head the distance between myself and others by evaluating whether I could comfortably fit between the other person and myself, were I to lie down. It still feels overly contrived, but things are settling down.

Since I began working from home on March 16, I have gone shopping three times and today I ordered Uber Eats for the second time. It ends up being quite expensive, since I make sure to tip the driver well and I also put extra money for the restaurant, but I am not spending money going out to eat or even driving to work, so I still come out ahead. Other than that, I always make my own meals and I have been really good about not wasting food.

I did run into a minor snafu on the food front, though. There is some leftover quinoa that I cannot bring myself to eat. I am not a big fan to begin with, but I noticed that the other time I had it, I did not feel well. My face started burning and itching, so I am wondering if I am allergic to it or it could have been contaminated with rice or gluten. I should just dump it.

J. Crew filed for bankrupcy today. I cannot imagine life without J. Crew, so I hope they are able to get the company's affairs in order.


segunda-feira, 4 de maio de 2020

De desconfinado a desconfiado: reflexões de um velho


Há quarenta e sete dias que não saía de casa. Saí hoje, uma vez que disciplinadamente me foi permitido fazê-lo: fui desconfinado! Não o digo com azedume. Compreendi muito bem que o que me pediam tinha fundamento e abdiquei, com pena mas sem esforço, do hábito que há uns três anos criara de caminhar, todos os dias, perto de cinco quilómetros. Isto a bem da minha saúde futura. Porque, apesar dos meus 84 anos, continuo a pensar que tenho futuro. É evidente que eu sou um privilegiado: estou na minha casa, suficientemente ampla e confortável, com todos os meios de comunicação actualmente disponíveis, com a minha Mulher, e com a assistência da Filha que, embora a distância, continua diariamente connosco, partilhando até, via Skype, as refeições festivas das datas que calharam neste tempo esquisito, os dias do Pai e da Mãe e o dia dos meus anos. Penso muitas vezes em quem não tem esta sorte, os que vivem em lares ou sozinhos, sem família, em condições precárias. Reconheço a dificuldade em tentar resolver o problema, mas esse teria de ter tido, porventura, maior atenção.